another year...

today is the eight year anniversary of my father passing.

i remember when my dad tended bar at western bowl. he was an avid bowler--three or four leagues a week. i think he did it to pay for all the bowling. after all, he and mom managed a bowling alley before i was born, and he went to the bowling alleys until they took the car keys away just before he died.

i guess i was 12 or 13 about the time of this memory. there was a band that played in the bowling alley bar called the now and thens. the drummer's name was fred and i had the biggest crush on him! he had awesome thick brown hair and a huge mustache. oh! i was so shy... but i loved to dance. i would drag my friend to the bowling alley every friday night.

my dad would give us kiddie cocktails and we'd sit at the bar like grown up ladies. we thought we were so cool-- all dressed up with our pink fizzy drinks with extra cherries. my dad thought this was hilarious, and he was brutal! oh, he'd tease me in front of fred about how i had this huge crush. i was mortified... until the guys started playing. then, i'd drag my friend to the dance floor and forget all about boys and kiddie cocktails.

when the band stopped playing and the lights went up, we'd help clean up the bar with dad. he'd tease me relentlessly until i'd be throwing olives and maraschino cherries at him. he'd be laughing so hard and i'd be teetering on the edge of despair or hysteria.

that was my dad, always keeping me real. never letting me forget to be a kid and have fun. it took years, but eventually those lessons helped me keep two feet on the ground and realize i didn't need to take myself so seriously.

western bowl is gone and fred is missouri state representative. but, i still love kiddie cocktails and dancing and men with big mustaches.

i'm trying to keep it real and have fun. but, it'd be a lot more fun if you were here, Dad.